In one of his more recent videos, the father-of-three can be seen shushing and bouncing a baby to sleep, before trialling some more, ahem, avant-garde sleep techniques.
“Go to sleep now or I’m going to set fire to this,” says the comedian, while standing next to the cot holding Ewan the sheep.
“I don’t actually want you to go to sleep,” he says in the next breath, trialling a bit of reverse psychology. “I think you should stay up all night.”
Next on the dad’s list of techniques is peer pressure. Perched casually by the side of the cot, stroking his face, he says: “So apparently all the cool babies have been getting early nights recently… Yeah, that’s just what I’ve heard.”
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Lewis also trials whale sounds, bargaining and the threat of cancelling Christmas. At one point he’s standing near the cot with a 4-pint bottle of milk.
But it’s the last tip that seems to do the trick: boring his child with chat about Bitcoin.
The 37-year-old from Manchester told HuffPost UK: “My baby isn’t sleeping at the moment so I’ve been desperately searching Instagram and TikTok for advice.
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“Once you try everything and it still doesn’t work you start resorting to crazy threats and ultimatums that a baby is obviously not going to understand.
“I thought it’d be funny to do a ‘how to’ video that isn’t particularly helpful but reflects our desperate behaviour as parents.”
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Parents dubbed the video “hilarious” and many seemed to think the Bitcoin tip – while a joke – was actually pretty genius.
There were also plenty of suggestions from others about the lengths they’d go to to get their little ones to sleep.
“I used to read books in a really boring voice, then I would fall asleep and they’d stay awake,” said user rachlbc.
“Just put a recording on of the finance review work Teams call,” added hannahlou1983.
Another commenter, nicoledanica, said the video was “spot on”. She added: “I’m a nurse and I used to give detailed lectures to my son about anatomy and physiology when he was a baby and would wake up in the middle of the night.”
My due date was fast approaching when I had a moment of clarity. Or it might have been madness, I’ll let you decide.
I’d been receiving maternity care at a local hospital – the same hospital where my eldest daughter had been born almost three years earlier – and decided I really didn’t want to go back there to give birth.
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So, at 34 weeks pregnant, I went online and did what I knew best: researched.
With my laptop perched on my ballooning belly, I looked at other hospitals and saw there were some decent options. But, palms all sweaty, I quickly realised it was the thought of another trip to the labour ward that was filling me with so much dread.
I briefly considered a home birth but realised I wouldn’t be able to relax properly if I knew our neighbours could hear me mooing away (and believe me they would be able to hear it – our walls are paper thin).
Then I saw something intriguing on Instagram of all places: a freestanding NHS birth centre and it was just 10 minutes further than the hospital where I’d been receiving antenatal care. How had I never heard about it?
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Why I switched up my care
I’m not a particularly anxious person but the very thought of going back to that first hospital to give birth filled me with dread. Just thinking about it would make my heart race.
The thing is, I had always thought I didn’t have a particularly bad experience at that hospital – compared to the horror stories I’ve heard, it was a “walk in the park”. I was one of the lucky ones. My birth was relatively straightforward: it was a vaginal delivery, no interventions, and my baby was OK.
I experienced some tearing but didn’t really think much of it at the time because it was all quite numb down there. My partner got kicked out a couple of hours after giving birth, which I found to be the most distressing part of all because I had no idea how to look after a baby and was absolutely exhausted.
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I remember spending the following 12 hours sat in a bloody hospital gown waiting for my partner to be allowed back into the hospital for visiting hours (cheers, Covid) so I could finally have a shower and hand our newborn over to him.
I was exhausted because I’d barely slept all night – my daughter had been born late the night before, so I’d been up all night checking she was still breathing and listening to the coughs of other mums on the shared ward, hoping they didn’t have Covid. It also happened to be the hottest day of the year which only added to my anxiety.
In the days and weeks after the birth, I experienced some issues with an infection and my stitches coming undone. I also saw a GP at my eight-week follow up appointment who checked my perineal area and suggested my tear had been worse than first thought.
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“I was one of the lucky ones. My birth was relatively straightforward: it was a vaginal delivery, no interventions, and my baby was OK.””
I felt I couldn’t really complain about the fact the midwife “popped my vein” – she failed to put a cannula into my arm before I was about to give birth, so we had to wait for a doctor to come and do it. My blood platelets had been on the low side so they thought they’d put a cannula in ahead of time in case I needed a blood transfusion or something – a thought which made me feel really relaxed!
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Or the fact that I had to be on a labour ward because of those cursed platelets and all I could hear in the rooms along the corridor were screams.
Or the fact I had two midwives – an experienced staff member and a student – rummaging around in my vagina, one after the other, before delivery. It prompted a panic attack and, I’d argue, was more painful than birth at points. Now, I know midwives are short on time and we all have to learn, but I was not prepared for how painful that examination was going to be. And I wasn’t allowed an epidural because of the platelet issue, so I felt it all.
These things were all unpleasant, but nothing compared to what I’ve heard from other mums. I was a lucky one, right? My baby survived.
I realise now – after years of mentally dismissing what had happened – that perhaps there was a reason why my body was going into fight or flight when I sat down to consider the thought of another hospital birth.
My body was saying no, and thank goodness I listened.
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So, at 34 weeks pregnant, I switched up my maternity care. It’s fairly easy to do – I self-referred to the birth centre and then called the hospital and explained I was moving my care across.
I had to do another booking appointment (this is the first appointment you usually do when receiving antenatal care in England, where they check your weight, height, take urine and blood samples, etc.,), but on the whole it was an easy process.
And I cannot stress to you how refreshing it was to speak to the midwives at Edgware Birth Centre.
They were so relaxed and didn’t overly-medicalise things. I asked about my platelets again and they didn’t seem worried – my midwife was so reassuring and, unlike at the hospital where I’d seen a different person each time, this person was someone I spoke to continuously for the following six weeks.
It’s hard to express what a game-changer it was having the same midwife for my antenatal appointments. When we chatted on multiple occasions in the run up to the birth, I felt like I was a human, not just a number who was there to pop out a baby.
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On the day I gave birth, I went to the birth centre at around 11am when my contractions were ramping up and called my midwife en route, who amazingly was on shift. They got a room ready for me and started filling the birth pool, as I’d asked if I could try that for pain relief purposes and also to help reduce the risk of tearing again.
When we got there, we went straight to the room and I nearly cried. They’d turned some fairy lights on and there was a diffuser pumping out a calming fragrance in the corner. The birth pool was trickling away. There was nobody screaming in the distance. The atmosphere was so… tranquil.
“Do you want a drink?” my midwife calmly asked me, and then my partner. We looked at each other in disbelief.
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Natasha Hinde
The room where I ended up giving birth.
The next few hours were a bit of a blur but consisted of a lot of reassurance from my midwife and her colleague who kept telling me that I knew what I was doing, to listen to my body, and to let them know if I felt an urge to push.
I believe their kindness and reassurance, as well as the feeling of safety from being in this little sanctuary they’d created on my behalf, helped everything speed up a bit and by 2.30pm, our baby was in my arms.
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I didn’t need stitches (thank you, birth pool) and by 7pm we were home.
It was a good birth – and I feel bad for saying that, because so many women do not get to have a good birth. I firmly believe that if I hadn’t switched up my care at the eleventh hour, it might not have been a good birth.
And of course, we can never know, but studies have found having a baby at a birth centre is as safe as giving birth in hospital,yet results in fewer interventions.
However, the story doesn’t end there. A few months after I gave birth, I received an email inviting me to join a consultation about the proposed closure of the birth centre. The NHS North Central London Integrated Care System said that, on average, fewer than 50 women give birth there a year.
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Under proposed new plans, the birth suites could be closed however the birth centre would still provide antenatal and postnatal services. I couldn’t believe what I was reading.
Deflated by the proposed closure, I attended the online consultation and sat listening to other mothers who had received positive experiences there.
The stories I heard hammered home exactly what can happen if a maternity service isn’t overwhelmed with demand and midwives can truly focus on the people giving birth: they are treated like human beings. The midwives have more to give because they are not physically, mentally and emotionally exhausted.
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The decision on the fate of the birth centre is due to be announced this spring.
Dr Jo Sauvage, chief medical officer at North Central London Integrated Care System, told me: “Your positive feedback is a great reflection of the midwifery team at Edgware Birth Centre. We want, above all else, for everyone who gives birth in North Central London to have a similarly high quality of experience, and this means making some difficult decisions.
“The proposed option that we put forward for consultation would see us retain and expand the antenatal and postnatal services at Edgware Birth Centre. For those who choose a midwifery-led birth, we are proposing to maintain the option of home birth, and co-located midwifery-led units which provide a home from home environment.”
Action group Delivering Better is currently calling on the Secretary of State for Health and Social Care, Wes Streeting – who has openly said the maternity crisis keeps him awake at night – to improve maternity care with two key changes: the chance to see the same midwife throughout pregnancy and proactive health checks after the baby is born at three and six months.You can add your voice to the open letter here.
There’s a lot of work to be done when it comes to overhauling the UK’s maternity and postnatal care system – and one birth centre cannot change that. But if it helps women have a good birth, a safe birth, then I’d argue it’s worth its weight in gold.
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Update: We have amended the article to clarify that, on average, fewer than 50 women give birth at Edgware Birth Centre each year.
A baby names expert has revealed the ‘vintage’ names she believes will see a resurgence in 2023 and beyond.
Mia Bardot, the editor-in-chief of Random Names, suggested monikers such as Julia, Betty and Vincent could see a revival in the popularity charts as parents look for “timeless classics which evoke nostalgia”.
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Celebrities are also exploring the vintage name trend with their new arrivals, which could prompt others to follow suit.
Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds, for example, have named three of their children James, Betty and Inez. They recently welcomed their fourth child, however it’s not clear what they have named them.
Bardot said: “It is so exciting to see these timeless classics resurfacing. Eleanor, Margaret, Julia, and Adelaide have royal and elegant rings, while Betty and Inez were immensely popular in the 20th century and present a charming simplicity.
“The sturdy and enduring appeal of names such as Henry, James, and Louis is hard to resist due mainly to their deeply rooted royal associations.“
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According to experts at Nameberry, the best vintage names are inspired by literary, biblical and royal sources.
Bardot predicts the following names will continue to rise in popularity throughout 2023, thanks to their “elegant and historical feel”.
A video of a baby interacting with their dad is melting hearts across the internet – and while it’s certainly got the cuteness factor, there’s also a very important lesson behind the video which an early years expert has shared.
The expert suggested this interaction helps “light up” a baby’s brain. He calls it “serve and return” – yes, like in a tennis match.
“Serve and return entails back and forth interaction during which adult and child trade conversational (and other expressive) turns,” Wuori explained.
The video shows the baby sticking her tongue out – which the early years expert described as a “serve”. The dad then “returns” by copying the expression, but also “extending her cues and vocalisations”.
According to Harvard University’s Center on the Developing Child, these ‘serve and return’ interactions shape brain architecture, help build relationships, and their absence “is a serious threat to a child’s development and well-being”.
This is why Wuori’s message was ultimately for parents to do as much interacting, face-to-face, with their baby and child as possible, which means being mindful of screen time and other distractions.
And no, this doesn’t mean watching them like a hawk 24/7, but rather taking time out to really connect with them, with zero distractions, throughout the day.
With babies, some examples of “serve and return” interactions might include:
If your baby smiles and you smile back at them
If they make a sound and you mimic the sound
If they look at something and you explain what it is.
If your child points at something, or seems interested in something, pay attention to what they’re focused on. This will help you learn more about your child’s abilities, interests and needs.
Offer children comfort with a hug and gentle words, help them, play with them, or acknowledge them. So, for instance, you could make a sound or facial expression, or nod, to let a child know you’re noticing the same thing.
Help name what your child is seeing, doing or feeling to help them learn to talk and understand words.
Take turns with them while playing or drawing, as this helps them learn self-control and how to play with others.
So, next time you’re in the presence of a baby or young child, you know what to do.
The photographers who document childbirth capture some of the most powerful and emotional moments in a parent’s life.
The organisation invited birth photographers to submit photos taken in 2022 and 2023 and received entries from almost 200 photographers around the world.
A panel of judges selected winners in categories like “between two worlds,” “birth team,” and “story in one image.”
“We put together this year’s showcase because we wanted to find a way to celebrate powerful birth imagery in a new way,” Nicole told HuffPost.
“By creating some more unique categories, we hoped to shine a light on images that often get overlooked in traditional photo contests.”
In addition to fostering a sense of community among birth photographers, Mason and Nicole work to change policies on social media platforms and offer courses for aspiring birth photographers.
Their biggest goal, however, is to make birth more visible, which they believe will help create a “safer and gentler” experience for all.
“We hope that people feel inspired by the images they see, and we hope they can recognise themselves or their birth story in some of these images,” Nicole said.
“We hope that this entire showcase illustrates just how diverse, powerful, and beautiful birth can be. ”
Keep scrolling for a selection of winning photos and other submissions and visit Birth Becomes You for the full collection. (Readers should note that the following uncensored photos show people in the act of childbirth.)
If you choose to breastfeed, those first few weeks where you’re figuring out comfortable positions and how to get your baby to latch properly can be a real rollercoaster.
I remember sobbing on day four because feeding was so painful and my boobs were like boulders (not so much in size, but more in how full they were – it felt like they were filled with concrete).
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My baby didn’t seem to be latching right either, the pinching sensations on my nipples were diabolical – so yeah, not a fun time for all involved.
Fast forward a week and – after some latching support from a midwife and health visitor – things were looking up. Well, aside from me routinely and explosively spraying my poor baby in the face with milk – we later learned I had an overactive letdown.
Finding a breastfeeding position that works for you can make such a huge difference, especially during those periods of cluster-feeding when you’re spending most of your time sat down with a baby glued to your boob.
Here are some of the most commonly used breastfeeding positions – with supporting images and illustrations from Lansinoh – to help you on your way.
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Breastfeeding positions illustrated.
1. Cradle hold
This is one of the most common positions for breastfeeding, however it might be uncomfortable for those who have had a caesarean, the NHS notes.
To do this position, sit in a comfy chair with arm rests or on a bed with cushions around you. Then, lie your baby across your lap, facing you. Their tummy should be facing yours.
Place your baby’s head on your forearm, with their nose towards your nipple. Your arms should be supporting their body. Meanwhile, place your baby’s lower arm under yours.
Check to make sure your baby’s ear, shoulder and hip are in a straight line.
Cathlin McCullough/Lansinoh
A baby feeding in the cradle position.
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2. Cross-cradle hold
This is touted as a good position for those with smaller babies and newborns. It’s similar to cradle hold, except your arms switch roles – so your baby’s body is basically lying across the opposite forearm to the boob you’re feeding them from.
Your forearm will basically be supporting their back and spine, with your palm supporting their shoulder blades, and your fingers under their ears.
As breast pump experts at Medela explain: “Because your baby is fully supported on your opposite arm, you have more control over his positioning, and you can use your free hand to shape your breast.”
This is a great position to try if you’re breastfeeding in the night, or you’ve had a caesarean or difficult delivery.
First, lay down on your side with your baby facing you, so you’re lying tummy to tummy. Your baby’s ear, shoulder and hip should be in a straight line.
It might help to put some cushions or pillows behind you for support and the NHS recommends a rolled up baby blanket popped behind your baby to help support them, if they can’t quite stay on their side yet.
Tuck the arm you’re lying on under your head or pillow and use your free arm to support and guide your baby’s head to your breast.
Need a visual guide? Check out this handy video from lactation counsellor Grace (@latchingwithgrace) on how she gets comfortable in the side-lying position.
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A baby feeding in the side-lying position.
4. Laid-back nursing
The laid-back position is pretty much what it says on the tin: you’re seated in a semi-reclined position – either on a sofa or bed. The position can be done by most mothers, however if you’ve had a C-section you might want to lie your baby across from you and away from your incision, the NHS suggests.
It’s also a great shout for those who have an overactive letdown (where the milk comes out forcefully) and, according to lactation counsellor Angela Das (@motherhooduntamed) it can also help them achieve a deeper latch.
To nail this position, lean back (but not flat) on your sofa or bed, propping yourself up with cushions so your back, shoulders and neck are supported.
Now, place your baby on your front so their tummy is resting on your tummy. For those who’ve had C-sections, this is the part where you would lay them to one side.
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The NHS advises parents to be seated upright enough that they can look into their baby’s eyes, and to gently support their baby, guiding them to the nipple.
Cathlin McCullough/Lansinoh
A baby feeding in the laid-back nursing position.
5. Rugby ball hold
The rugby hold can feel a bit tricky to begin with, however it’s another good position for those who’ve had C-sections, as there’s no pressure on the incision area, as well as parents of twins.
To do this, you’ll need to sit in a chair with a cushion (or two) along your side. Then, position your baby (/babies) at your side, under your arm, with their hip close to your hip. Their upper body will be positioned along your forearm. The NHS suggests your baby’s nose should be level with your nipple.
Support your baby’s neck with the palm of your hand and gently guide them to your nipple.
Check out this video from midwife and lactation consultant Libby Cain (@libbyandco_nz) on how to do the rugby hold.
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A baby feeding in the rugby position.
6. Koala hold
This position can be good for mothers who have older babies or an overactive letdown. It can also be done with newborns however they’ll need lots of support.
According to experts at Medela, this position can also be more comfortable for babies who have reflux, ear infections, tongue-tie or low muscle tone.
In this particular position, the baby will sit on your thigh, with their legs dangling either side. Their spine and head will be upright as they feed. For a demo of this nursing position, check out this video from lactation consultant Kathryn Stagg (@kathrynstaggibclc).
When you become pregnant, and then give birth, there are a lot of dos and don’ts as far as taking medication is concerned.
For instance, ibuprofen isn’t advised for those who are pregnant – unless prescribed by a doctor. This, says Jana Abelovska, superintendent pharmacist at Click Pharmacy, is “due to the negative effects ibuprofen can have on a baby’s kidneys and circulatory system”.
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But after your baby has been born and is breastfeeding, what happens then? Should you still avoid it?
It’s no wonder then that ‘can I take ibuprofen while breastfeeding?’ is a commonly Googled query – alongside other popular asks like whether you can have Lemsip or Strepsils when breastfeeding.
We asked Abelovska to walk us through what pain relief medication parents can take, and should steer clear of, when breastfeeding little ones. Here’s her advice.
Is it safe to take ibuprofen when breastfeeding?
The good news is that for breastfeeding women, ibuprofen is “completely safe” to take – and is actually one of the recommended painkillers for women while breastfeeding, says the pharmacist.
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You can take it as a tablet or use it on your skin.
“Ultimately, only minuscule amounts of the drug pass from the breast milk into the baby’s body, and therefore pose no real risk to babies,” Abelovska explains.
Well, that’s a relief.
Can I take Lemsip when breastfeeding?
With cold and flu season lurking around the corner as we head towards the cooler months (sorry), people are also understandably interested in whether it’s OK to take decongestants like Lemsip when breastfeeding.
Abelovska says: “Interestingly, while decongestants – like Lemsip – are unlikely to directly affect a breastfeeding baby, they can have a negative effect on the mother’s milk supply.
“Therefore, it is recommended that breastfeeding mothers avoid all types of medical decongestants and instead use safer alternatives, such as inhaling steam.”
Experts at NetDoctor agree, saying the production of breast milk can decrease “with just one or two doses,” so Lemsip is “best avoided by mothers who are breastfeeding”.
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What about Strepsils?
Throat lozenges can help ease a sore throat if you’re struggling – but it’s always best to ask your pharmacist to recommend one that is safe for breastfeeding, according to the Health Service Executive (HSE).
In the case of Strepsils specifically, Abelovska says the Honey and Lemon varieties “seemingly pose no risk to breastfeeding women.”
But she warns other Strepsil products, such as Extra Triple Action Blackcurrant Lozenges, are not recommended.
“Strepsils’ package leaflet for the triple action throat sweets recommends avoiding the product if pregnant or breastfeeding,” she explains.
If you’re confused about what’s best to take, Abelovska recommends having an open discussion with your GP who can advise further.
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What medicines should you avoid when breastfeeding?
There are a wealth of medications that aren’t recommended for women while breastfeeding, says the pharmacist. “This can be for various reasons such as affecting milk supply or the risk of the medication getting into the milk.”
A video of a baby “two-stepping” is melting hearts everywhere.
In the clip, a healthcare worker can be seen stroking down each side of a newborn’s spine, with its bottom instinctively wiggling in the same direction.
But is this wizardry? Or is there a reason why babies do this?
Dr Karan Raj, a medical doctor and author of This Book May Save Your Life, took to TikTok to explain the phenomenon, which is known as the Galant reflex.
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The purpose of the reflex is to “encourage movement and develop a range of motion in the hips”, he said, which helps prepare babies for crawling and walking.
The reflex can also be tested in newborns so healthcare professionals can help rule out brain damage at birth, the doctor explained.
The doctor describes is as a “cute baby software glitch” because hypothetically, it should disappear by around nine months old.
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Reflexes happen when our bodies are stimulated in some way and our muscles respond to that stimulation.
“The presence and strength of a reflex is an important sign of nervous system development and function,” say experts at Mount Sinai.
A lot of infant reflexes – like the Galant reflex – disappear as a child gets older. If it’s still present as they age, it can be a sign of brain or nervous system damage.
Another fascinating reflex babies are born with is the rooting reflex, which happens when a baby’s mouth is stroked or touched.
According to Stanford Medicine, in response to this touch, the baby should turn their head and open their mouth to follow and root in the direction of the stroking.
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It basically helps them find the breast or bottle so they can fill up on milk.
They also have a suck reflex, whereby when the root of their mouth is touched, they’ll automatically start to suck.
And one many parents will be familiar with is the Moro reflex – otherwise known as the startle reflex. When there’s a loud noise or movement, a baby will throw back their head and extend their arms or legs out, like they’re falling.
What’s stopping new mums from breastfeeding? That’s the question photographer Ania Hrycyna set out to uncover when she gathered 15 mothers together for a candid festival-inspired photoshoot of them feeding their babies.
Ahead of World Breastfeeding Week (1-7 August), the South London-based photographer and mother brought together a group of local women at a local airfield and asked them about the challenges they’d experienced in their breastfeeding journeys.
The photographer’s hope is that their stories – and gorgeous photos – will foster more empathy and understanding of the difficulties women face. And one theme that crops up time and time again is the lack of support new mothers face.
Here are some of their stories.
‘He struggled to latch and I received very little support from midwives at the hospital’
Ania Hrycyna
Gloria
I started breastfeeding my firstborn in May 2017. He was tiny and very sleepy, really struggled to latch and I received very little support from the midwives at the hospital.
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Once at home, he lost 13% of his birth weight. The home health visiting team were fabulous and helped me increase my milk supply and get onto an exclusively breastfeeding path which we followed for two-and-a-half years (until a couple of weeks before the birth of his little brother).
I thought after breastfeeding for two-and-a-half years it would be a doddle the second time around, but I guess I underestimated that my new little bundle had to find his way, too.
I managed to settle onto breastfeeding Hugo, who again I fed for two-and-a-half years. This time until I was about 30 weeks pregnant with my third baby, Max.
I have recently gone back to work after maternity leave so just learning to live in our new chaos and finding the right balance between expressing at work and co-sleeping so that he can get all his milk feeds.
I love the bond from breastfeeding my babies.
‘I never knew two breastfeeding journeys could be so different’
Ania Hrycyna
Clare
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In 2020, I became a mother to our first child Lilah Ottalie. Breastfeeding was something I had set my heart on and it came so naturally to us both – born in water, she climbed up and latched on within moments, despite having a tongue tie.
She fed perfectly throughout my second pregnancy in 2022 and is still going strong today.
Our second child, Ottis Malachi, had a harder time learning to latch and feed. He was born very fast, he was tired and so was I – everything was a blur. He didn’t feed at all for the first 48 hours, he never got any of my golden colostrum. I felt very let down by the team at the hospital, I still do.
They wanted him to try formula as he couldn’t latch and he was losing energy. Lilah has a severe cow’s milk protein allergy that had her in and out of hospital for the first eight months of her life. I have been dairy-free for the last three-and-a-half years for this reason.
The hospital could only offer me cow’s milk formula for Ottis, which I had no choice but to accept. He reacted more or less straight away and I knew the symptoms so well that I declined the next feed. It was all on me.
Giving birth in lockdown meant my partner wasn’t allowed in to support me either, and it was the first time I had ever left Lilah, who was still breastfeeding and wasn’t allowed in to see us. I was heartbroken with a new baby that needed me.
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We stayed in for four days until we were discharged with a feeding plan of me exclusively pumping to supply him with what he needed. Ottis had a lot of problems – we found out he also had a tongue tie and a high palate with a shallow latch.
At six days old he finally latched on his own for the first time. He really struggled to find his way to my nipple, so it was suggested at six weeks that we replicate being born and the newborn crawl to the boob. It helped and I was so emotional.
I had been told I wouldn’t be able to feed him and it was a long road but we got there in the end. He still wouldn’t latch every time and struggled a lot, he used to get very frustrated and chompy which had me in a lot of pain and tears. He also has low muscle tone making it hard for him to hold on when feeding.
I never knew two breastfeeding journeys could be so different. I have now been tandem feeding for a further year-and-a-half.
‘We need to be more open about the issues surrounding breastfeeding and where to go for support’
Ania Hrycyna
Kirsty
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I knew I wanted to try breastfeeding, but also knew things might not work out and I didn’t want to feel too let down if I wasn’t able to. If anything I had almost convinced myself that I may not be able to because I was unable to harvest any colostrum before giving birth – despite my best efforts. I made sure to pack bottles of formula in my hospital bag.
With there being so much emphasis on ‘breast being best’ I did feel a bit guilty about being so comfortable with the idea of giving my baby formula straight away, like I had quit before starting – but now looking back I realise I had a lot of worries about breastfeeding in general with questions in my mind such as: Will I produce enough milk? Will it mean my body will never be my own again? Will my nipples be leaking milk all the time?
When I gave birth to my daughter, suddenly all of the feelings of anxiety and worry were quickly replaced with confidence as I watched her crawl up my stomach after birth, navigate her way to my boob and latch her little mouth – it was truly magical.
In this moment I fully understood and felt what my hypnobirthing teacher had meant when she said to trust your body and baby. Breastfeeding hasn’t come without the lows, though, and one of the things that surprised me was the pain – especially in those initial weeks when my daughter would cluster feed.
We’re told that breastfeeding should be a pain-free experience that will come naturally to us and our babies, which I don’t believe is true for the majority of women. I cried numerous times through the hard times in our journey, constantly thinking: why is this so tough when it’s supposed to be the most natural thing?
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I think as a society we need to be more open about the issues surrounding breastfeeding and where to go for support, so that women can prepare themselves for the common issues and not struggle silently.
‘I felt like I was already failing as a mother, less than an hour after becoming one’
Ania Hrycyna
Ligia breastfeeding her baby.
I always knew I wanted to breastfeed my children – my trouble was in having those children. After a good few years, I finally got pregnant thanks to the miracle of science, and then Covid-19 struck.
Serafina was born in September 2020. I tried to feed her in the minutes after birth, but she wouldn’t latch. I was devastated, especially as the breastfeeding nurses kept telling me it was because I have flat nipples. Hormones and tiredness didn’t help, but I felt that not only could I not conceive naturally, I couldn’t feed her naturally either. I felt like I was already failing as a mother, less than an hour after becoming one.
The following day, I was ‘allowed’ to express, so at least she was getting the good stuff… When I got home, I persevered with breastfeeding – my husband bought every contraption under the sun to try and help with my ‘flat nipples’ and the midwife who visited on day five tried to help me with positioning.
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Serafina did start feeding, but I was in agony, kept getting blocked ducts, and had a baby or a pump attached to my boobs nearly 24/7. About six weeks after Serafina was born, I finally plucked up the courage to join a breastfeeding Zoom session. I was recommended a lactation consultant who arrived the next day and diagnosed a severe posterior tongue tie within two minutes of walking in the door and advised the stabbing, freezing pains I was feeling was vasospam.
A mere 10 seconds after the tongue tie was severed, Serafina latched onto my boob – and it felt amazing.
When we decided to try and have another baby, I was told I wouldn’t be able to start the hormone treatment until I’d stopped breastfeeding Serafina. After everything we’d been through to get to this point, how was I going to stop?! And why was I putting a potential future baby ahead of the real life baby girl I held in my arms?!
The guilt was crushing. But we eventually did it (with many tears!). Persephone was born in January this year and latched on and started feeding within minutes. It was a totally different experience. It still didn’t feel quite right, but it wasn’t painful. Tongue tie was discounted, so I just got on with it.
We were eventually referred to the tongue tie clinic because Persephone had green stools, and lo and behold, she had posterior tongue tie. To say I was annoyed is an understatement. But at six months old, she is now feeding much better. It has not been an easy journey, but I’m so proud of myself and my girls.
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‘There is so much more to breastfeeding than just feeding a baby’
Ania Hrycyna
Helen breastfeeding her child.
I always knew I wanted to breastfeed, so when my eldest daughter was born in 2013 I was delighted when it came quite easily to us both. When her younger brother was born 16 months later, it was a different story.
He had a tongue tie and feeding was really painful. I didn’t know how or where to access good support and believed the people who told me nothing could be done to make his feeding more comfortable.
I fed him for a year but it was a good three months before it felt comfortable. The same thing happened with his younger sister, born 18 months later and also with a tongue tie.
When my fourth baby was born and feeding was again painful, I knew a bit more about tongue tie and what to do. We found support, had her tie divided and feeding was so much easier from then on.
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I decided to train as a breastfeeding counsellor, partly because I had always loved feeding my babies (despite the pain) and wanted to understand it more, and partly because I wanted to be able to offer others the support I had so desperately needed myself.
I spent two years completing a foundation degree and during that time my fifth and sixth babies came along, both with tongue tie. I recently gave birth to my seventh baby (again with tongue tie), who is in this photoshoot.
I find it so rewarding to be able to help people to work through difficulties and to be able to continue breastfeeding, where that is important to them. It has also been a huge help to my own breastfeeding journeys, which have not been without their difficulties, to understand how breastfeeding works and the impact that the various challenges can have.
I hear first-hand how valuable that support is for new parents and I am passionate about providing accessible support to anyone who needs it through drop-ins, free telephone helpline support and signposting to other services.
There is so much more to breastfeeding than just feeding a baby and I enjoy the constant learning that comes with working in breastfeeding support.
When it comes to babies and toddlers, it’s safe to say there’s no rulebook as far as sleep is concerned.
While there’s no shortage of books out there telling parents how much their children should be sleeping at various stages in their development, the reality is that no two babies are the same so they’ll have very different sleep needs.
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And, when they reach toddlerhood, well… good luck to you as you spend hours each evening trying to get them down to sleep. (Sorry, I might be projecting.)
But does it actually mean something when an infant naps little and often?
Well, a new study suggests it might. Some children are more efficient at consolidating information during sleep, so they nap less frequently, the research found.
Conversely, University of East Anglia researchers found that it’s usually the case that frequent cat-nappers tend to have fewer words and poorer cognitive skills than their peers.
The takeaway? The research team said these children should be allowed to nap as frequently and for as long as they need.
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For the study, researchers analysed 463 infants aged between eight months and three years during lockdown in 2020.
Parents were surveyed about their children’s sleep patterns, their ability to focus on a task, keep information in their memory, and the number of words that they understood and could say.
They also asked parents about their socio-economic status – including their postcode, income, and education – and about the amount of screen time and outdoors activities their child engaged in.
As the research took place during lockdown, it allowed researchers to study children’s intrinsic sleep needs because they weren’t at daycare, which is where they tend to sleep less.
They found the structure of daytime sleep is an indicator of cognitive development.
Lead researcher Dr Teodora Gliga said: “There is a lot of parental anxiety around sleep. Parents worry that their kids don’t nap as much as expected for their age – or nap too frequently and for too long.
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“But our research shows that how frequently a child naps reflects their individual cognitive need. Some are more efficient at consolidating information during sleep, so they nap less frequently.
“Children with smaller vocabularies or a lower score in a measure of executive function, nap more frequently.
“Young children will naturally nap for as long as they need and they should be allowed to do just that.”
Parents of frequent cat-nappers needn’t worry though.
The findings suggest that “children have different sleep needs – some children may drop naps earlier because they don’t need them anymore,” said Dr Gliga, and that “others may still need to nap past three years of age” – and that’s OK.
