Category Archives: poop

The 1 Thing More People Wish They Knew About Before Giving Birth

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When it comes to birth, we tend to focus on the prize. Having a child emerge from your body is, obviously, the main event. It’s followed by delivering the placenta, sometimes referred to as the “afterbirth.” Luckily, this part is usually pretty quick and painless — you may barely register that it’s even happening.

But in the hours and days that follow, your body will experience another minor milestone: the first postpartum poop. If you’re lucky, this will also be fast and forgotten as soon as you flush. However, given what your body has been through, the buildup to this event can be anxiety-inducing.

Here’s what you need to know, as well as some tips to ease discomfort.

How this poop is different

There are a number of factors that may make this particular trip to the bathroom feel more significant.

First, you may not have had a bowel movement in a while. “If you had a long induction or a long labor, and you haven’t eaten in a long time, you probably don’t have a lot that needs to come out. It may take several days,” Dr. Andrea Braden, an OB-GYN who practices in Georgia, told HuffPost.

Constipation may also be a side effect of pain medications, fluctuating hormones, or simply your own hesitation.

If you’ve had a cesarean section or an assisted delivery (via vacuum or forceps), or you’ve had a tear or episiotomy repaired with stitches, you may be in pain from that, and understandably reluctant to do anything that might aggravate your discomfort. But holding in your stool can make things worse.

“Some people will actually try to hold it in and not have a bowel movement, which causes constipation,” Braden said.

Haemorrhoids, which are common during this time, can also cause pain when you go to the bathroom.

While this is all uncomfortable, it isn’t unexpected.

“In my 26 years of experience, at least 90% of my clients have had trouble using the restroom after birth,” Kali King, a doula in Virginia, told HuffPost.

Tips for a smooth move

Stool softeners or laxatives can help you get that first bowel movement out without straining, which you’ll want to avoid if you ended up with stitches after your delivery.

“The goal would be to not push when you have a bowel movement,” Braden said. “You want it to come out very easily, because the pushing can cause a lot more pain and pressure on the incision sites, no matter where the incision is.”

King recommended light exercise or abdominal massage, as well as a squat position to help get things moving more easily.

Lori Bregman, a doula in Los Angeles, noted that staying hydrated is another way to prevent constipation. If you’re looking for something other than water, she recommends coconut water, bone broth and electrolyte drinks (like sports drinks). Fibre-rich foods like fruits and vegetables help, too.

A tablespoon of coconut oil can act as a natural stool softener, Bregman said, and a foot stool such as a Squatty Potty can help you get into a comfortable position while you’re on the toilet.

You’ll also be given a peri-bottle, a little plastic bottle that you can use to squirt water on your nether regions to clean yourself after going to the bathroom. This is much more comfortable than dry toilet paper, particularly if you had stitches in that area.

Haemorrhoid help

Haemorrhoids are “swollen blood vessels in the rectal area that develop from the pressure [of] your growing uterus and increased blood flow. They can be itchy and painful,” Bregman said.

Unfortunately, if you have them at the end of a pregnancy, delivery can exacerbate the problem. “They are extremely common during pregnancy and can get a lot worse especially if you pushed for a long time,” Braden explained.

Studies show that about 40% of people who give birth suffer from hemorrhoids before, during or following delivery. Pushing for longer than 20 minutes is associated with haemorrhoids, as are assisted deliveries (forceps or vacuum). Your provider may mention that you have them when they examine you after delivery, and you can also ask them directly.

The good news is that haemorrhoids “usually resolve on their own,” King said.

There are many things you can do to reduce the discomfort of hemorrhoids. Bregman recommends:

  • chilled or frozen witch hazel pads with drops of vitamin E oil
  • frozen leaf of an aloe vera plant
  • sitting on a donut pillow
  • using a footstool while on the toilet
  • sitz baths
  • ice
  • comfrey root ointment
  • acupuncture

When to call the doctor

Hemorrhoids can cause bleeding in the rectal area, but if you don’t have them, or you’re uncertain, bloody stool is definitely something to report to your health care provider.

As far as constipation, it’s probably time to call the doctor “if you haven’t had a bowel movement in a week and you’re feeling quite constipated,” Braden said.

Other symptoms that you’d want to report to your provider include “pain, swelling not going away, infection, weird smell, lots of bleeding and an intuitive feeling that something doesn’t feel right — always trust and follow that,” Bregman said.

King recommends that you not allow your provider “to downplay your symptoms.” If you feel that this is happening, you can look for a second opinion.

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I Had To Poop In Front Of My Husband To Finally Realise I Wanted To Marry Him

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I met my first husband when I was 30 and very quickly decided, “This is it!” And once I’d proclaimed, I refused to admit that, well, it wasn’t. Call me naive, stubborn or hopelessly romantic, but not only did I not break up with him when I clearly should have ― we got married. I was a captain going down with the ship if the ship was a legal document tying you to someone you actually don’t even like.

It did not work out.

Within a week of meeting my current husband, I told him, “Just so you know. I’m not getting married, and I don’t think I want kids.” It became a quote so famous, we immortalised it on the cocktail napkins at our wedding.

At the time, I meant those words.

When I met Bo, I was swiping on Tinder for a hookup. A fling. A nice guy who wouldn’t annoy me and would *hopefully* be good in bed. Not a boyfriend, and certainly NOT a husband. Fresh out of that super toxic and incredibly dysfunctional first marriage, the last thing I wanted was any real intimacy.

Even if I did meet that mythical creature referred to as “the one.” I did not trust my decision-making skills. Sure, my ex had sold me a bill of goods, but I bought it. (It’s me, hi, I’m the problem, it’s me.) I picked someone so unbelievably wrong, and I didn’t just date him. We made it fucking legal.

But Bo caught my eye. He had a picture of himself with a black eye on his profile, but the look on his face wasn’t giving “bar fight.” It was giving, “This is a dumb story I’d like to tell you about.” Turns out he had walked into a door. Not even a glass door. He had my attention.

Still, to prove to the universe and to myself that no man could hold me down, I flaked on our first date. I didn’t even make an excuse. “I’m having too much fun at a winery with my girlfriend. Can we reschedule?” He wasn’t offended. He just proposed a new date.

We met for drinks the following Thursday, and something happened that I was not expecting. We clicked. It was natural, organic ― I was being myself. Gross. There was a palpable attraction, which was my ultimate goal for the evening. But our conversation flowed. We went on more dates, but I had him at arm’s length. What the hell did he want from me? With all this “nice guy” tomfoolery. Surely he’d turn into a demonic loser. I just had to give it time.

When he invited me to a Halloween party his parents were hosting, I immediately said no. Meeting his parents? Was this guy high? Curiosity overruled my trepidation when he showed me the invite featuring an artistic drawing with a woman’s nipples exposed.

I told him I’d go for research purposes only. We attended the soiree dressed as the sisters from “The Shining.” I spent the evening smoking cigarettes, drinking whiskey by the pool and casually talking to his friends.

“This isn’t serious, this is a fling” was my mantra for the night.

A week later, one of my friends was having a party. I invited him, then immediately started to sweat. We went to a late lunch beforehand, and I sat there with a hoagie in my hand and felt sick. Why had I invited him? I started acting weird, and he finally asked me what was wrong. To my surprise, I told him the truth.

“I don’t want you to go to the party. I’m not ready for you to meet all my friends.”

He didn’t get mad or make me feel bad. He just said, “OK. I don’t have to go.”

Six months later, we moved in together.

I loved living alone. I loved my apartment. For the first time since hitting puberty, I didn’t need male approval to approve of myself. I never needed to live with someone again. Once I realised that, it freed me up to choose it.

Maybe that explains what happened when I came home from a bachelorette party feeling hungover and sappy one night. I blurted out a question that was NOT premeditated.

“But what if I want a baby?”

When I got pregnant with our son, I STILL wasn’t on board with marriage. I knew Bo would be a good dad and a good co-parent. I didn’t need him to be a husband as well.

Fun fact! You have to have a bowel movement before they let you leave the hospital after a cesarean birth. Maybe that’s the rule for vaginal birth, too. I’m never finding out. After the baby was born, I could barely sit up or get out of my bed, let alone walk to the bathroom. So when the moment finally felt right, Bo had to escort me. He held my hand as I cried on the toilet and pushed out a No. 2.

the wedding napkins with the infamous quote

Photo Courtesy Of Christina Birdsall

the wedding napkins with the infamous quote

I had never been that vulnerable with any partner before. I made a baby with this man, but it was in that moment of relief that I finally felt like I could really commit to him. An emotional barrier dropped along with my BM.

My first live-in boyfriend picked me up from the airport once after I had accidentally soiled my skinny jeans on the plane (bad oysters). I tried not to hug him for too long or make direct eye contact.

I shoved my pants in the dumpster as soon as we got home, and we ended things about five months later. It wasn’t directly related to this incident. But the fear of sharing my poopy pants told a deeper story. I was afraid that if I shared my authentic self ― the good, the bad and the smelly ― I’d be rejected.

I can trace the lines of my relationships’ past and directly link each one to a similar lack of intimacy, vulnerability and trust. I felt more in control when I was seeking approval. It blinded me. With Bo, I want to be with him, but I don’t need to. Now I can see the difference.

We celebrated our marriage on May 6, 2023, with close friends and family. But it was only once I let it out that I really started to let him in.

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Is Your Poo Healthy? Check This Clinical Chart To Find Out

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Everyone poos, but it’s still something a lot of us have an awfully hard time talking about. (Unless you’re my 6-year-old and 3-year-old, who cannot talk about poo enough, it turns out.)

But it’s unfortunate that poo talk tends to make adults squeamish, because our stool can offer some powerful clues about what’s going on inside our guts – and even more broadly within our bodies. And doctors really do wish people would lean into it.

“When I ask patients to describe their stool, even when they’re at the GI doctor, you can almost immediately sense their discomfort,” Christopher Henry, a gastroenterologist at Thomas Jefferson University in Philadelphia, told HuffPost.

Enter the Bristol Stool Chart (sometimes called the Bristol Stool Form Scale or the Meyers Scale), a diagnostic tool that health professionals can use with their patients to help determine what’s normal (and what’s not) in terms of size, texture and colour of poo.

In general, ideal poo is Type 3 or Type 4. Type 1 or Type 2, on the other hand, can indicate a person is struggling with constipation. And Types 5, 6 or 7 can suggest diarrhoea – though not always.

“Sometimes I’ll have patients with very severe constipation, and they’ll have periodic diarrhoea,” Henry said.

That particular example shows why the stool chart really shouldn’t be used by laypeople to self-diagnose. Instead, people should see it as a jumping-off point for health-related conversations – and it certainly can help make those discussions less awkward. Many people find it easier to point to a line on a chart than to have to search for the words to describe their stool to a provider, Henry said.

Doctors, on the other hand, can use the chart to help diagnose conditions like various types of irritable bowel syndrome, or IBS.

If your poo pretty consistently falls outside of the normal types on the chart, that’s definitely worth flagging to your doctor, who might refer you to a specialist. Significant changes in poo frequency or form also are worth noting. And don’t ignore other gastrointestinal symptoms. That includes heartburn that doesn’t get resolved with antacids, blood in your stool, severe pain or unintentional weight loss.

Even if your poo-related issues turn out to be relatively mild, a doctor might be able to help you with some simple changes that can help you achieve the ideal poo (and feel better overall) – like getting sufficient fibre and water.

But experts caution against getting too caught up on whether your poo is exactly the right texture and colour based on the chart – especially because there are many slightly different iterations of it floating around the web. Also, people’s stool colour can vary based on what they eat.

But what the Bristol Stool Chart can do pretty well is provide clarity.

Henry recalled an experience when he was working with multiple patients complaining of diarrhoea, but when he asked them to point to what their stool looked like on the chart, they pointed to Type 1 – which actually indicates constipation. They believed that diarrhoea referred more to frequency, rather than to a particular stool form.

In cases like that, the chart helps to create a shared language, to make sure patients and their providers are on the same page.

“I think of it kind of like a Rosetta stone. To make sure we’re using the same words to mean the same things,” Henry said. “It’s a platform for patients and doctors to have better conversations.”

Because talking about poo may not be most grown-ups’ favourite thing to do, but it’s an important part of overall well-being.

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